Failed Critics Podcast: The Crimson Halloween Beasts

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All of you that have never listened before and have seen your family die [from laughing], huh, you now have something that stands for you! That would be the Failed Critics Podcast: Halloween special.

OK, so it is a couple of weeks early, but think of all that extra time we’ve given you to source the incredible horror movies from a whole host of different decades that we discuss during our spooktacular (urrgghhhh sorry) triple bill. With picks by hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes, and guests Carole Petts and Phil Sharman, there’s plenty for you sink your fangs into (aahhhhhh sorry sorry sorry).

Before all that, we begin as we always do – with a quiz! Steve is in control of the questions and still 2-1 up after last week’s disaster (get it?) leaving Owen teetering on the edge of being handed a potentially diabolical booby prize should he be unable to prevent a joint Carole and Phil triumph. Perhaps regardless of whatever film might await either Owen or Steve, nothing could truly be more distressing than the news that a Die Hard prequel has gone into production. Still, at least there’s the London Film Festival round-up and Godzilla vs King Kong news to discuss, eh?

We even found time to sneak in a couple of new releases alongside our main triple bill feature. With reviews of Guilermo Del Toro’s latest visual gothic tale in Crimson Peak, and the very first Netflix original movie, Beasts of No Nation, starring Idris Elba, there was plenty to talk about in this week’s episode.

Join us again next week for DE NE- NEEERRRR, DE NE- NERRRR, DE, DE NER NER NERRRR… 007 is back for his longest outing yet with the release of SPECTRE.

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Failed Critics Podcast: The Scottish Podcast

Failed Critics Podcast: The Scottish Podcast

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Is this a dagger I see before me? No, it’s just this week’s triple bill edition of the Failed Critics podcast!

Acclaimed Glaswegian author Escobar Walker debuts alongside noted-neds and podcast regulars Steve Norman, Owen Hughes and Paul Field, to review the Scottish play-turned-movie Macbeth and to each pick their three favourite films from north of the border.

We kick things off as we always do with a quiz,one that is – yes, you guessed it – Scottish themed. Before that though, we have a short pre-credits intro that should give you an insight into just how depraved and filthy the combined minds of Paul and Esco can get. You have been warned.

With no other new releases to review this week, and no ‘what we’ve been watching’ section, we devote more time to our review of Macbeth than Paul spent awake during his entire short cinema trip to watch director Justin Kurzel’s big-screen Shakespearean adaptation.

To wrap things up the team share their three favourite Scottish movies. Alas, this might be a spoiler and maybe even come as a shock or disappointment to a few of you, but nobody picks Highlander, Braveheart or The Wicker Man. I can only apologise, but we do find some other real classics to talk about instead.

You can join Steve and Owen again next week where we’ll have more guests, presumably less profanity, and reviews of Suffragette and The Walk.

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Failed Critics Podcast: The Intern, The Martian & Sicario

Failed Critics Podcast: The Intern, The Martian & Sicario

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Hello and welcome to this week’s Failed Critics Podcast, released slightly earlier than usual to try and push it out just before the end of International Podcast today (that’s today for the next couple of minutes, anyway!) As such, we recommend you check out our fellow podcast comrades Wikishuffle, Black Hole Cinema and Diamond & Human; all of whom are deserving of your time during your commute or whilst peeling the spuds, or whatever you do whilst you’re listening to us.

Joining Mexican assassin Steve Norman and intergalactic failed critic Owen Hughes for this week’s episode is Andrew Brooker, undertaking his unpaid work placement, as they review three new releases. They’re so new, in fact, that they are not even out in the UK yet! First up, Owen reviews new Ridley Scott sci-fi The Martian (which doesn’t feature any aliens – xenomorphs or otherwise) before Brooker seethes over the new Anne Hathaway / Robert De Niro comedy The Intern. There’s even room for a review of the much anticipated crime-thriller Sicario, starring Emily Blunt as an FBI agent working with Josh Brolin and Benicio Del Toro on the trail of the Cartel in Mexico.

Before any of that though we have our quiz (which Steve helpfully explains in detail) and news section where the team react to Sam Smith’s Bond theme replete with improv poetry, The Simpsons opening Smithers closet, and the Prometheus sequel details. This is followed by our usual what we’ve been watching section, which sees: Owen review cult 80’s horror From Beyond as he pleads for your HP Lovecraft recommendations; Steve runs through three first watches of Beverly Hills Cop, Cooties and Cop Car; and Brooker reminds himself of a time when De Niro could do comedy well with Analyze This.

Join us again next week as we review ‘the Scottish play’, Macbeth, and have a very special guest in tow for our Scottish triple bill: It’s the acclaimed author of the Three Realistic Holes trilogy of novels, Escobar Walker!

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Failed Critics Podcast: One MILLION Dollars! Triple Bill

Failed Critics Podcast: One MILLION Dollars! Triple Bill

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Welcome to another episode of the Failed Critics Podcast. As promised, Steve Norman is back in the host’s chair this week as the award winning duo of Jack and Phil from Wikishuffle depart to be replaced by Matt Lambourne from the award winning video-game podcast Retro Asylum, such is the quality of guest on our shows these days!

As ever, they are both joined by Owen Hughes for this week’s triple bill episode, where each member of the team pick three films made for one million dollars or less in a bid to prove that the quality of a movie is not always dependent on its budget.

Before all of that, the guys also take a look at the Primetime Emmy Award winners announced this past weekend and indulge themselves with the final round of our ongoing quiz – which, for once, isn’t as shambolic as you might expect! There’s also time for:  Steve to tackle Everest, starring Jason Clarke, Jake Gyllenhaal and Josh Brolin amongst others;  Matt blows the dust out of his Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie cartridge;  and Owen joins him in continuing the video-game adaptation conversation by listing everything wrong with Mortal Kombat: Annihilation.

Join us again next week for reviews of Sicario, The Intern, and The Martian.

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Failed Critics Podcast: Legend, The Visit and Award Winning Comedy

Failed Critics Podcast: Legend, The Visit and Award Winning Comedy

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Do you want to hear a magic trick? How many C’s are there in Failed Critics?

Answer: Four! Specifically, Owen Hughes, Phil Sharman, Andrew Brooker and special guest host, Jack Stewart. I will leave it to your imagination to work out what the ‘C’ stands for…

…All right, it was ‘critics’, of course! Failed ones, but what else could I have possibly meant..?

Unfortunately there’s no Steve Norman on this week’s episode, but the award winning duo of Phil and Jack from the comedy podcast Wikishuffle join Owen and Brooker to review two new releases. Whilst Phil prepares a rant on M. Night Shyamalan’s latest twisty-turny-twist-again-turn-again horror The Visit, the group also review British gangster movie Legend, starring Tom Hardy as Ronnie Cray and Tom Hardy as Reggie Kray.

Also on the podcast: Brooker walks the line with Oscar winning documentary Man On Wire; Phil tentatively recommends Jonathan King’s (yes, that one) self-produced Vile Pervert: The Musical; and Owen shouts from the stands about indie doc Sons of Ben: The Movie. There’s even time for Phil jump into the host’s chair briefly for this week’s quiz, and we rant over SPECTRE‘s potentially 160 minute run time.

Steve Norman returns as host next week along with Owen and guest Callum Petch to review Everest. Join us then!

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Failed Critics Podcast: Sharman & Other Filth

Failed Critics Podcast: Sharman & Other Filth

american_ultra_2015-1366x768Welcome to another edition of the Failed Critics podcast. This week, hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes are joined by Paul Field (making his first appearance since the Corridor of Praise: Danny Dyer episode) and Phil Sharman, one third of the award nominated comedy podcast Wikishuffle.

On top of the news about Danny Boyle confirming production will begin on Trainspotting 2, there are two new release films reviewed by the team this week; Nima Nourizadeh’s stoner comedy American Ultra, starring Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart, and the Statham-less Statham-vehicle Transp4ter (…no? AKA The Transporter Refueled.) As well as the new releases, Owen discusses the documentary Welcome to Leith (which is screening this week at the Cambridge Film Festival) with Paul, who also reviews Fort Tilden. Phil rewatches a recent favourite in The Adjustment Bureau and Steve follows up on a discussion from last week’s FrightFest summary by checking out Australian pre-post-apocalyptic thriller These Final Hours.

Fans of our classic debates will also be in for a treat as plenty of our most popular topics were brought up for discussion at various points! A conversation about the Netflix series Narcos somehow ends up as a rambling stream of thought about the BBC and future of broadcasting. The Transp4ter review leads into another rant about film classification. We even manage to squeeze in a quick chat on the merits of found footage horrors, American remakes of English language movies and a short quiz complete with dodgy fake accents.

Steve will be on holiday next week but you can join Owen and Phil again, who will be ably assisted by Jack Stewart and Andrew Brooker to review Legend, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl and The Visit.

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Failed Critics Podcast: Straight Outta FrightFest

Failed Critics Podcast: Straight Outta FrightFest

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You are now about to witness the strength of street knowledge as four white boys from the UK discuss N.W.A. biopic Straight Outta Compton on this week’s Failed Critics Podcast. Joining crazy mother-flipper Steve Norman and another crazy arsed bad mother-flipper Owen Hughes on our latest episode is Andrew Brooker, a dangerous mother-flipper raising hell, and controlling the automatic is Mike Shawcross.

We’re not entirely as gangster as you might expect, believe it or not, as we kick off the podcast with a quiz and a short tribute to Wes Craven. We manage to express ourselves in a more dignified manner befitting four dudes sat around in their pants on Skype, late on a Tuesday night, during reviews of video-game adaptation Hitman: Agent 47, Nic Cage thriller Joe, the pilot episode of Fear the Walking Dead and James Cullen Bressack’s indie-horror To Jennifer.

On top of all that, we have a round-up of the good, the bad and the ugly that came out of this year’s Film4 FrightFest. Get your notepad and pen ready as Mike reveals everything you should be adding to your watch list over the next 12 months – including These Final Hours, Turbo Kid, We Are Still Here, Bait and loads more! I’m not exaggerating. LOADS more.

Join us again the same time next week as Paul ‘Slice’ Field returns to mull over No Escape and The Transporter Refuelled.

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